How to Help Someone with PMADs

Ask.

If she has told you in the past that she’s struggling or is worried about having PMADs, ask directly: “How are you doing with postpartum depression?” Saying just “how are you?” may make her think you are just engaging in small talk.
If she hasn’t confided in you but you’re concerned, ask less directly, but more specifically than a general “how are you?” For example, “How are you doing? You seem down.” Or “How are you adjusting to motherhood/having 2 kids?”

Don’t look shocked. Some of the feelings and thoughts of PMADs are shocking. They may require help and counsel, but your reaction can make her feel worse than she already does about how she feels.
Give her as much time as she needs and don’t be bothered by her tears. Offer to communicate via email at first if she doesn’t want to say it out loud.
At times, say nothing. Job didn’t need his friends’ comments; he needed them to just sit with him and mourn.

Ask how you can pray for her and her family, whether that’s specifically regarding PPD or just generally in motherhood and life.
Pray aloud for her or at least let her know what you are specifically praying for. It gives her extra hope and support to know you’re not just saying you will.
Remind her other times, in texts throughout the week, etc. that and how you are praying for her.

Many aspects of PMADs only time can heal. There may be long seasons where she struggles to believe or even care about the promises of God. In these times, lamenting and grieving with her can be the greatest support, and will be more meaningful and encouraging than trying to cheer her up.

Offer specifically: “Can I bring you a meal on Wednesday?” “If it would help you, when this week can I come over to give you an hour to yourself/do the dishes/watch your older kids/take the baby on a walk?”
If you don’t have a specific way in mind to help or don’t know what would be most helpful, ask – “how can I help lighten your load this week?” or “What do you most need/want right now?” Even ask if there are ways you can help her do what she needs to do to heal.
If you don’t have the time to go over and help yourself, suggest a mutual friend – “I won’t tell her what you’re going through unless you want me to, but I can ask so-and-so if she would come over to bring you a meal and keep you company on Tuesday.”
Point her to God, but know God may feel far away and she may be angry with Him. Give her unchanging hope (who God is, Christ, salvation, heaven, etc.) to hold on to and help her grapple with the difficult things she’s feeling and fight them with spiritual truth and physical help. Give her scripture, but apply it to her situation specifically or it may feel trite (sometimes it may no matter what).
In your encouragement, be careful not to compare or assume you know how she feels. Even if you have had PMADs, every woman is affected differently.

She cannot simply pull herself out of this. Even if she does everything she can, it will still take time.
Your words, especially words of hope, may seem like they fall on deaf ears. Not everything will get through to her, and some truths may even be upsetting at certain times.
PMADs can start anytime from pregnancy through the first year, and can last beyond that. Don’t assume that she is better or not at risk just because baby is older.
Moms can always use extra support, especially when they have a baby under six months, and that’s even more true if PMADs are a factor.
Remember that women can have PMADs and not look like it. You may be surprised at who has them and who is still struggling.